The asteroid hadn't hit yet. The air was thick, humid, and vibrant with the chirps, roars, and rustles of a world teeming with primeval life. Jesus, sandals dusty and robe shimmering with an inner light, stood on a small rise overlooking a verdant valley. He wasn't supposed to be here, not in this time. But the Father, in his infinite wisdom and amusement, had sent him on a mission. He wasn't entirely sure what the mission was, only that it involved bringing joy. And possibly evolving better head feathers on the Parasaurolophus.
He saw them first, a trio of Brachiosauruses gently browsing the canopy. Their immense forms were graceful despite their size, their long necks swaying like reeds in a breeze. Jesus smiled, a warmth spreading through him. He knew they were sentient, in their own way, connected to the earth in a primal understanding.
He began to hum, a simple melody that resonated with the very core of the planet. The ground vibrated subtly. The Brachiosauruses lifted their heads, their massive eyes widening in curiosity. They lumbered closer, drawn to the music.
Then, a Tyrannosaurus Rex, undeniably the most intimidating creature within a ten-mile radius, emerged from the jungle. It roared, a sound that shook the trees and rattled Jesus’ bones. He didn't flinch. He just kept humming, his melody unwavering.
The T-Rex stopped, its tiny arms flailing slightly. It tilted its massive head, its predatory gaze softening, confused. It was used to eliciting fear, not… this.
Suddenly, Jesus began to dance. It wasn’t a religious dance, not a solemn ritual. It was a joyous, exuberant expression of life. He twirled, he leaped, he swayed, his robe swirling around him like a halo of light. He moved with a freedom that defied gravity, a lightness that belied his earthly form.
The Brachiosauruses, initially bewildered, started to sway their necks in time with the music. The T-Rex, after a moment of stunned silence, began to tap its enormous foot. It looked utterly ridiculous, a prehistoric apex predator tentatively keeping rhythm to a divine jig.
Soon, other dinosaurs started to gather. A cluster of Ornithomimuses, curious and bird-like, pecked at the ground in time with the beat. A herd of Triceratops, usually grumpy and territorial, watched with mild interest, their frills vibrating slightly.
Jesus beckoned the T-Rex closer. The creature hesitated, then cautiously approached. Jesus reached out and took one of its tiny arms. "Come on," he said, his voice filled with laughter, "Let me show you how it's done."
The T-Rex, bewildered but unable to resist the invitation, allowed itself to be led. Jesus showed it a simple two-step, a modified version of the hora he’d learned at a wedding in Galilee. The T-Rex, surprisingly coordinated, caught on quickly, its enormous bulk moving with an unexpected grace.
Soon, the entire valley was a chaotic, joyful mess. Brachiosauruses swayed, Ornithomimuses peed, and even the Triceratops were begrudgingly tapping their feet. Jesus danced with them all, laughing and singing, filling the valley with an unheard symphony of joy.
The asteroid still loomed in the future, a dark inevitability. But in that moment, under the warm, prehistoric sun, surrounded by dancing dinosaurs, Jesus had brought a moment of pure, unadulterated joy to a world that would soon be gone.
He looked up at the sky, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Maybe I should teach them the Macarena," he muttered to himself, before spinning into another joyful leap, his sandals kicking up dust as he danced with the dinosaurs, a shepherd of a truly unique flock. His mission, he realized, wasn't just about joy, it was about celebrating life, even when it was fleeting, even when it was prehistoric, even when it involved dancing with a Tyrannosaurus Rex. And in that moment, he knew the Father was smiling
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